by Alex Cook
IHH Alumnus

tonight while i was reading, I was reminded once again that Jesus is pretty radical. i mean fresh on the scene and this guy just never stops pushing the envelope. that is so refreshing, so encouraging to me that God in the flesh is an extreme sorta person.

sometimes i get so sick of being an extreme person, i feel like i don't fit in nice and neat in society and social circles. sometimes i think people wonder why i can't just "fall in line" and "settle"... be part of the "norm"... i can't seem to, never have been able to, and i am not so sure it's a bad thing. i was created to be on the edge, to stir up the pot, and to set fires on my way.

so, my current situation, i have settled. settled for happiness in a bottle and a few cigs to help me relax. settled for a comfortable lifestyle yet always needing more of everything. i was thinking today of switching career paths, i know i could make more money doing something else, i feel like i want to make more money so i can live more comfortably, get out of debt, feel like i am a good provider, and also have plenty to share with others. these aren't necessarily bad things but what should i really be focused on?

well, God would say to seek first His Kingdom, His presence, the righteous life, and ALL of these things will be provided for me! wow... he knows what i want, he knows what i need, and all of these things will be provided, even without me worrying, prying, kicking down doors... wasting time. pretty peaceful stuff. you know when you know you've heard from God? if you have never heard from God you should talk to him and listen, it is the best. the wisdom and the peace that follows is indescribable.

so after this revelation, which i have surely heard many times before, i wonder how to live it. how to apply it? how to take it on as a part of me. i wish i could just insert these sorta things into a cd-rom drive in my soul and download it. it's so much simpler dealing with things in the "physical world" things you see, taste, smell, hear, touch... but i will attempt to focus on this, tomorrow when i wake i will think about how God has my back, He has sweet things in store for me and i can be pumped for that. i simply need to seek Him, walk with Him, be in tune with my God. good stuff